(B) PLEDGE
MAKING
A
member of a Christian couple attended a Christian gathering and felt lifted
high in the spirit, with no consideration for the partner who was absent from
the meeting, made a pledge that she was going to donate her next salary for
God’s work. By the end of the month she carried out her pledge: but the husband
was disturbed greatly, realizing the number of children they had to cater for
as well as other dependants and other needs. For the first time in their
married life, the husband had to speak in a harsh way and the wife exclaimed “
so money is dividing us so soon! Why all the bullying on me? On that day they
had to look at each other’s face. I will leave you in suspense to consider the
extent to which the devil could use such a situation against the couple’s
unity, all because of not counting the cost before making her pledge.
Luke 14: 28-30. Definitely, there is need for adjustment when one is married:
here I would not say it is money, only dividing them but also lack of proper
planning.
(C) SOUL
WINNER/VISITOR ENTERTAINER?
Imagine another who
used to buy things for young converts, bring them home, feed and live together
for as many days as the converts would love to continue.
On getting married, the
brother continued with this system, to the extent that the wife started to
worry, regarding the amount of money they spend in feeding outsiders, that is,
the husband’s converts and several other visitors. On an occasion, she decided
not to cook because she found out that she was cooking soup not less than 4
times a week.
The husband got angry
and asked why that happened. She told the husband that he was lavishing their
money on visitors. This discussion which started in a simple way got heated up
to some extent that only the grace of God brought the situation to a calm. Even
though there was calmness, the woman decided and stopped keeping joint account
with the husband from that time for what she considered an unwise method of
spending which she observed in her husband.
But the Bible correctly exhorts us not to be weary in
doing good for thus Abraham entertained angels unawares. Gal. 6:9-10; Hebrews
13:1-3. So it is not that you should not entertain visitor but be in agreement
as to what percentage of your budget goes on any act of kindness.
(D) EDUCATION
OF RELATIVES, IN-LAWS DEMANDS etc.
Consider a Christian
couple who started well, indeed like the bible in Genesis 2: 24 which says “for
this reason will a man leave his father and mother...” This couple is a good
example of leaving and cleaving, doing many things in unity having full
confidence in each other even in financial matters. But at a time the woman
started observing that there was what she considered a serious ‘Leakage’ in
their purse from the husband’s side because he had to maintain three of his
junior brothers: two in grammar school and one in primary school. Besides,
there was the case of regular giving to Daddy and Mummy.
The wife then
calculated how much was being spent on ‘her own side’ and she hesitated
whether she should continue keeping joint account with her husband. One day she
opened a fresh account and instructed that her salary be henceforth paid to the
new account instead of the joint one she was running with her husband.
It was after about two months that the husband realized
what had happened. Nothing was forthcoming from the wife. He innocently called
the wife and said, “Darling, they have been cheating you in your place of work
for they have not paid your salary.” In the first instance the wife was afraid
and was wondering whether to tell the truth or a lie, then she soliloquized,
“Anyway as a Christian I shouldn’t tell a lie: but would that not cause a
division in the home if he should know the true situation of things?” While
still thinking of what to do the husband started to imagine that the wife must
have been in the know of what happened since it took her so long a time to
answer the simple question and so he asked again “Or have you asked them not
to...” The wife interrupted, “Well you caused it: when you spent most of our
money on other people, I am afraid we might never be able to execute any
tangible project if we continue this way.” And so the devil was successful in
driving a wedge of separation, at least financial, between the couple. Truly
there is need for understanding between Christian couples and proper and agreed
planning so that their prayers be not hindered. 1 Peter 3:7. Also there is need
for bowel of mercy. Colossians 3:12; Prov.19:17; Deut. 15:7-11; Luke 6:38
(E) CEREMONIES
There is the case of another couple. The
wife loves annual ceremonies, like birthday celebration, marking wedding
anniversary and related ceremonies. Unfortunately, the woman was just a
housewife. She had to depend solely on the husband’s income for all her
expenses. Because the man would not welcome such expenses, he kept explaining
that his meager salary could not meet with such demands and that there was need
to be frugal. The wife, whenever alone, kept questioning herself, “Is it because
I am not working? I am such a pauper!” So she kept wondering how she could
start some daily contribution out of the soup money the husband gave. Hence
dishonesty started creeping into her way of life. She would try to buy things
that are cheap, low quality stuffs and her husband noticed that her food was
losing taste. Moreover she used every opportunity to scrape and gather money
from her husband. On an occasion of her birthday, from her thrift, she had
bought a particular attire and the husband was wondering how she got the money.
To cut the long story short, the husband
became suspicious of his wife. This way again, money dealt a dividing blow into
the couple and brought a wedge of dishonesty, suspicion and diminished
confidence. Remember Achan – Joshua 7:20; 1 Tim.6:6-10 “The love of money is
the root of all evil. Also the Bible warns us against living in pleasure. 1
John 2: 15-17. “Woe to them that are at ease in Zion.”(Amos 6:1).
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