DELIBERATE DETERMINED STEPS.

2Timothy 3:1 "This know also, that in the last days perilous times shall come."

Turmoils, hunger, insurgencies, epidemics are some of the common place occurrences in our world today. We are indeed in perilous times. All over Africa, these are difficult times. As we talk of imminent famine in Sudan, Ethiopia, Somalia and Nigeria, among many others, we skip outside the continent to Venezuela where over 90% of the oil-rich country cannot afford three meals a day. India, Brazil, Haiti are not faring better. Terrorist groups like Boko Haram, Fulani Militia, Al - Shabab, ISIS, Al - Queda and many others are on the rampage all over the world. Indeed we can echo the words of the English poet, T.S Eliot, and say "things have fallen apart; the Centre cannot hold. The falcon cannot hear the falconer. Sheer anarchy is loosed on the world."

In the midst of all these, what is the Christian attitude? It is pertinent to examine this because when people are hungry and angry, they look for victims to vent their anger upon. Usually, Christians and Jews are the soft targets! We have seen thousands of Christians displaced from their homes. We have seen thousands of Christian women deprived of their husbands who were slain or butchered like cows. In Iraq, Syria, Nigeria, and many other countries, this is happening on a daily basis. At such a time like this in the past, brother Peter the Apostle wrote: 1 Pet 2:21 "For even hereunto were ye called: because Christ also suffered for us, leaving us an example, that ye should follow his steps." Following His steps in a determined, deliberate and intentional walk.

His steps? Yes. He had a focus, Heaven. That was all that mattered to Him, pleasing His Father in heaven. He said my Father works so I work. He said I have a baptism to be baptized with and how I constrained myself. He said my will is to do my Father’s work and finish it. We must make heaven our goal, our ultimate focus. He had regular recourse to the place of prayer to commune with His Father. We must be deliberate in carving out time to be with Him in the place of prayers and study of the word. He shunned all appearances of evil and lived above board to the extent that He could claim: the enemy came and found nothing in me.

Holiness must be our watchword. The Bible warns us: "without holiness, no man shall see God." People of God, let us be sober and do what we can for the Master, for the night comes when no man can work. The rate at which people of God are being taken up to heaven is alarming. The night may come for us sooner than expected. In keeping close to God in prayers and Bible study on a daily basis, He will guide us into steps to take in these perilous Times. The wickedness of the wicked cannot escape God. Let us listen to His directives and take the counsel of good old Mary: "whatever He says, do it." The victory of the cross is assured. People who don’t know our God are rejoicing at our temporary travails. But watch it, our God shall arise, and that very soon. For us, determined, and deliberate walk with the Master. Those who have ears should hear what God’s Spirit is saying to the church. Maranatha!

‘Bayo Famonure.

P.S. You asked for this some time ago. I wrote it within one week of your request but I left the last paragraph till today (31st July, 2021) to make it a birthday gift. Happy birthday 

Uncle Bayo

 

RESOLVING THE TREND OF DIVORCE IN OUR SOCIETY PART 11

 One of the ministers on the platform expressed his own plans too. According to Reverend K.O:

1. As a pastor of a local assembly, I dedicate one Sunday in two months to emphasize the importance of Godly homes to the church and society and the evil consequences of divorce on the family, (children and the couple), Church and the society.

2. I will also influence my pastor friends to do something to check the trend of divorce in their respective sphere of influence.

 

Mrs. R.D. raised a very important point. She said, “Most of our Church Marriage Counsellors are not trained, and so cannot give professional counselling beyond their expertise. There's the need for trained counsellors to be part of the Marriage Committee in our churches, and be easily accessible for people to benefit from their services.” 

From my experiences both as a growing child, and in my marriage, I desire to have a blog where I can post materials on staying together in marriage. “You fall in love to get married, but you grow in love to stay married,” she concluded.

 

 Mrs. Ade is of the opinion that looking at the rate of divorce in our society, it is obvious that many couples are not genuinely born again, and some are still babies in Christ, even though they might have been in the church for several years. Therefore, the need for salvation should be made very clear to our church members.

Also, some Churches do not take Marriage counselling seriously, so some couples did not have any counselling knowledge as regards marriage. All they are after is the wedding day not knowing that marriage is more than that. Churches should endeavour to train godly couples to serve as marriage counsellors in their Marriage Committees. She stated further that some sisters lack home training, for example in the area of cooking and since men generally love good food, this can cause friction in the home and subsequently end in divorce, if the wife refuses to improve. There’s no harm in attending a short course in Cookery and home management, so as to add taste to their family life.

In her concluding statement, she encouraged all Christians to pray for troubled marriages. She wrote, “if there is any family/home that we know which is passing through a hard time, let us intervene prayerfully and God will back us up and give them victory in Jesus name.”

 

According to sister E, we should “pray that their eyes of understanding will be flooded with light.” When this is done based on the word of God, couples will never see divorce as an option.

 

In her own words, Mrs. F. B. opines:

i.                    Anyone who is ready for marriage should be able to define what she or he wants and how to achieve such without allowing any distraction.

ii.                  From the onset, the ways of the Lord should be inculcated in our relationships and children should be guided in like manner.

iii.                There is a need for understanding spiritual warfare in every area of marital life, especially when there’s a particular trend in any of the couple’s family history.

iv.                Regular talks and seminars on Marriage should be put in place in our churches.

v.                  Christians should serve as Role Models and example of believers in all things.

vi.                Above all, if any marital challenge is becoming life-threatening, the couple can be counselled to consider living separately until a solution is found, or provided.

This is suggested because there has been cases of a partner killing his or her spouse because there’s serious tension in their relationship and any little provocation can trigger violent outburst which may go beyond their control, and subsequently results in one partner killing the other.

 

CONCLUSION

In conclusion, I will like to encourage us to meditate on the afore-mentioned points carefully and prayerfully. The power is in our hands to stop this evil trend as children of God. Healthy families will result in healthy Nations. Despite the fact that in some churches, couple-to-be are taken through Pre-Marital Counselling classes for three to six months, some people still build on a false foundation due to a deceitful lifestyle. According to Mrs. D, there was the case of a couple who after going through Church Counselling got married, but after some time the lady found out that where the husband was staying was his friend’s apartment. Unfortunately, that was the end of that marriage.

 

What stopped them from discussing that problem before marriage? So Counsellors have a lot to do mostly in the area of teaching. The foundation of every Christian home is Christ. He should be our first lover. Couples must trust God and be ready to adjust wherever possible. God sees and understands our pains, we must embrace forgiveness all the time! Let us rely on God to help us through the journey of life. May His work in our hands continue to flourish as we await His coming. Shalom.

RESOLVING THE TREND OF DIVORCE IN OUR SOCIETY PART 1

 INTRODUCTION

Sometimes in the year 2020, during the Corona Virus pandemic, a lot of Ministries/Churches resulted in online programmes since it became impossible for people to assemble in their Churches and Fellowship halls. As Joyful Callers Counselling Ministry, the Lord laid it on our hearts to run online teaching, so we came up with a WhatsApp teaching group tagged “Free Counselling Class.” We had fifty-three registered participants from six countries, which was quite encouraging. Cross-fertilization of ideas from different worldviews also added value to our discussions to the glory of God. Different topics were discussed over a period of six weeks (Wednesday evenings only). One of the issues we dealt with was the issue of divorce. This was a big concern to us seeing the increasing rate of divorce in our societies. We were not just interested in discussing various factors that are responsible for divorce, rather we are more interested in suggesting ways of combating this menace so that we can all enjoy a more stable family life where our children can be brought up in the way of the Lord, and grow up to become responsible citizens of our beloved countries.

 

Therefore, I asked the participants on the platform to share with us their own resolutions on how to reduce the menace of divorce in our societies. The edited responses are hereby presented.

  

Mrs. A. A opined, “By the grace of God, my resolution is to put more efforts into what I am currently doing in the area of Christian Parenting in the 21st Century (WhatsApp platform). I believe that the decadence of our society streams from homes. Therefore the home front needs healing. The home front needs fixing. We need to go back to our first love where Christ is modeled before the children, as the head of the home.”

 

Another person states thus: Children are silent observers to their parents' marriages. Opinions and mindsets are formed early, often strongholds are formed in their subconscious young minds that ultimately deeply influence their own attitudes to the institution of marriage. It, therefore, comes as no surprise that a son who grew up seeing his father beat up his mother, often replicates the same abuse in his marriage, but for the grace of God. A daughter who watched her father unleash various forms of domestic abuse upon her mother may be completely turned off towards the institution of marriage, because why would she want to suffer a similar fate? Such reasons have been implicated in late marriages, marital problems and consequent divorce.

 

I believe strongly that, “there is a place of personal responsibility in marital harmony and success. A married couple should also be continually aware of this fact, that their attitudes and actions in their marriage are a constant lesson to their children and impressionable young minds in their sphere of influence and thus, strive to set a good example. To stem the tide of divorce in society, the change must begin within. – Dr. O.O
Some others believe that Forgiveness helps to keep us in the right direction with the Holy Spirit, and gives us a peaceful mind. Also when God sees our willingness to forgive, He helps us further without much effort on our side. Unfortunately, we are not willing to take the pain to forgive at times because we don’t fully understand the good that comes from forgiveness. Forgiveness is a strong foothold for the Holy Spirit to do wonders. Forgiveness brings healing and it repairs our relationship with God and with one another. It brings a refreshing to the soul. Therefore, a godly way to resolve divorce is for couples to embrace the virtue of FORGIVENESS. Forgive your partner as God forgives you.   Mummy O. O. presents her own views in the following words:

1. Parental care and teaching of moral values, cultural values, and most importantly Godly values from the Bible must be taken seriously.

2. Teaching the young ones before marriageable age the value and permanence of marriage. This is very important because we are in an age where singles (male and female) see a marriage relationship as one that can be dissolved at will. If it works, fine, if it doesn’t work we call it quits. Any couple that enters into a marriage relationship with such a bias may likely not endure, and adjustment will almost be at zero levels. We need to teach our children that marriage is God’s idea, not man’s, and He meant for it to be permanent, only death is allowed to separate the couple.

3. Praying through for the deliverance of homes and stoppage to activities of home enemies through the blood of Jesus.

4. Organising Counselling and teaching sessions for couples as regards God’s word concerning marriages and keeping the homes secure will also help.

5. Discipleship sessions for converts after they might have experienced the salvation of their souls will help people to value God’s word in all circumstances of life..

6. Living an exemplary Godly life worthy of emulation will equally help.

 

In adding her own voice to this all-important, life-saving discussion, Mummy Y. M, wrote, “As an individual, who is in the Marriage Counselling committee of my local assembly, I have resolved to continuously counsel intending couples never to consider divorce as an option and to let them know about all the people that will be affected negatively if there is a divorce in a home.” This is a very healthy step to take because many people only think about their own selfish desire to have their way at all cost, forgetting that many people are tied to their lives. For instance, what becomes of the children after a divorce case? What about the mental health of the partner who never anticipated such disruption to his or her life’s journey? People must learn to sit back and think meditatively on the word of God in Malachi 2: 16, “… For the LORD of Israel says that He hates divorce.”

 

Mrs. Y. Y. B’s resolve is this, “to advise intending couples to be friends first before marriage. This will help them overcome issues like communication gaps which open the door to several other problems. If there is genuine communication and bonding, divorce will not come to play.” Mrs. A.A. asserts, “I am trusting God to help my children and all other people that God is sending to me, to get it right before marriage, to go for pre-marital counselling, and to take it seriously.” A pastor who is serving in a Franco-phone context puts it this way, “In the culture where I am, marriage is a contract and not a covenant. So the issue of divorce is not an issue with them at all.” There are certain foundations laid that do not allow marriage to take place at all, if eventually it does, divorce is at the corner if the couples do not pray very well. So we need to tackle divorce spiritually than physically. Also, courtship before marriage is very important, and during courtship, there should be no sex. Once a would-be couple is involved in sex it is a sin against God, and it covers errors. A faulty foundation that is! It is advisable that the couple should be attending Marriage seminars together so that they can learn how to please God in their homes. That will help a lot to curb this menace. – Pastor E.U.J

 

VISION 2021: CLARITY OF VISION IS KEY!

 

 

                

(Commissioned Message by Dr. Esther Adenike Luogon, President of Joyful Callers  Counselling Ministry- http:www.joyfulcallers.org)

 (Habakkuk 2: 1-3)

2:1- I will stand upon my watch, and set me upon the tower, and will watch to see what he will say unto me, and what I shall answer when I am reproved.

2:2 –And the LORD answered me, and said, Write the vision, and make it plain upon tables, that he may run that readeth it.

2:3- For the vision is yet for an appointed time, but at the end, it shall speak, and not lie: though it tarry, wait for it; because it will surely come, it will not tarry.

 

Beloved. What is the Vision? What did God show you for the year 2021? Not what others are showing you on their posters and platforms! It is important to see right and to see clearly. Write the Vision! Make it clear!  CLARITY OF VISION IS THE KEY FOR 2021! It may not appeal to your senses! It may even look ‘insignificant!’ This can’t make our Ministry ‘fly’ or popular! Who owns the Ministry?  Your vision or God’s vision! Those Goals and Vision statement for the year 2021!  Who owns them? You or Papa God? That’s where many of us miss it. May God help us to hear Him clearly, See the Vision clearly, and Run with the Vision with all our Strength.

 

Worries and anxieties about how to achieve those gigantic visions may not be necessary if indeed the Vision is from Above! Let’s look inwards beloved. What exactly did God call you to do for Him? He called you to be an Evangelist to the dying world. But you have chosen your own path of planting Churches and settling down as the “Great” Servant of God. Now you are full of Complaints and Confusion! You caused it friend! Go back to the ‘original Commission!’ The pattern God showed you when He called you. I understand the struggle of support. Yes! It is still part of the journey to pleasing the Lord. Trust Him Always! “God’s work, done in God’s way, will never lack God’s supply, “opines the Missionary Statesman, Hudson Taylor.

 

LET THE VISION BE CLEAR & LET US FOCUS ON THE VISION HE GAVE US FOR 2021.

 

MARANATHA! MARANATHA!